Friday, September 2, 2011

What it means to be the first African American President...getting your buttons pushed

We have probably all grappled with the experience that has been labelled "getting our buttons pushed." What we tend to mean by that is that there are people who know our sore spots...those places where we tend to react (in anger) because we have been hurt there before. When people know our sore spots and want to get us off our game, they can manipulate us into the reaction they're after. And so, for most of us, we have to eventually learn to deal with those issues to heal the hurt that caused them in the first place. Its either that or build gargantuan walls against the people who could touch those places, or live our lives at the mercy of those who would exploit us.

I believe that this is a frame through which some of us white folks might begin to understand what it means to be a black person in this country. For most African Americans, they have a lifetime of living with a sore spot...ways they have been hurt over and over again simply because of the color of their skin. It might be the obvious things, like being followed in a store or being pulled over by a cop for no reason. Or it might be having your accomplishments questioned because you are an "affirmative action" hire. Maybe it happened in school when you were directed to "vocational" choices instead of a college track - or when you and your friends were identified as a gang because you stuck together to defend yourselves from others who were trying to bully you. These things hurt - bad - and they piss you the hell off!

After awhile they build up and are added to the whole generational legacy of anger and hurt that Hamden Rice talked about. And so you have a sore spot that allows for the possibility of people pushing your buttons. And you have to figure out what you're going to do with it.

For many, this is where the "angry black man" stereotype comes from...and with very good reason. And then that is added to the list of sore spots. Angry black men are not allowed to express their anger.

This is the dilemma that President Obama is facing. And, as a reader at TPM says, African Americans are noticing how Republicans are trying to push his buttons when it comes to things like "schedule-gate."

When Boehner does something like this (that no previous Speaker has done to any previous President), when he refuses to return the President's phone call during the debt ceiling crisis, when he skips state dinners, when he refuses to definitely say that he believes the President was born in the US or is a Christian, or when Boehner coddles a member of his caucus who shout "you lie" during a Presidential address, etc one certain thing happens - black Americans notice it.

African-Americans are especially sensitive to the unprecedented disrespect that white Republicans have afforded to the first black President. Every time it happens, it ripples across black radio, black newspapers, black websites, and in conversations in black communities. It helps cement the ties that Obama has with the black community, and helps overcome whatever doubts and disappoints some may have. It reminds people who have experienced overt racism in their own lives that the President is experiencing the same kind of dehumanizing disrespect. It will help drive strong African-American turnout and overwhelming numbers for Obama next year.

Political pundits may gossip about the rift between Boehner and Obama, but millions of black Americans see something much more sinister when this happens.

Many white progressives think President Obama should get angry and fight back at these moments. But most African Americans have "been there - done that" and know that someone is just trying to push their buttons. Here's Vyan over at Daily Kos:

Black People hear these Dog-Whistles. They know what they mean.

And they also know that all of these little attacks are intended to Goad them. To make them lose their cool, to make them lose their temper, to make them look irrational and angry.

The Irrational, Paranoid, Screaming Angry Black Man.

That's what they want to turn Obama into. The Angry Black President.

They want him to start Complaining and Whining about the Republicans not treating him nicely. They want him to start "Playing the Race" Card, just so that they throw it right back at him.

And that's also why he resists. It may be infuriating. It may be crazy making. But this is the double-bind that many Black people have had to face all the time when these slights and broadsides come at them with racial undertones, but few clear or logical overtones...

I've lived with that internal, mental battle my entire life - and I very nearly have reached the "Fuck IT/FUCK YOU!" point more than once. Generally speaking, it didn't help much.

That's not the road Obama intends or needs to go down, sorry.

The truth is that white progressives are getting their buttons pushed every day by the Republicans. And they're pissed as hell that President Obama isn't expressing their anger about that. Would that they could learn a lesson or two from their black brothers and sisters about what a useless road that is to travel...as well as a glaringly stupid way to give away your power.

25 comments:

  1. Thank you Smartypants for this post. I am a 69 yr old white woman and I have never seen such disrespect for this President. I don't want him to get angry and say thins that will set everybody back for generations, that's what happened with Watts Riots, the riots in Gary, Indiana, it was detrimental to the black community for generations. I love and respect this President and will work to reelect him next year. I am so glad for your site, TOD, TPV and a few others. Keeps me sane.
    Love to sane liberals.
    Roberta in MN

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  2. I applaud you for putting into writing what so many white democrats need to understand. As a community, we need to show the solidarity we have for the President. Youre right, he cant be the "Angry Black Man" Ive become at some times but dammit, we can do it for him. He deserves far better and for the black community the behavior by Boehner and that loser Joe Walsh who lives in the same state as the President should cement the fact that we must fight back like MLK Jr himself was leading us to Selma bc now unlike then, they hide behind masks and guard their racism. It MUST be made public. Another thing I cant stand is to here Allen West type black men acting like they have no idea what the President is going through, for all of us; guys like that will talk badly about another black man whos made it farther than anyone but ride his coattails as far as possible. Shameful.

    Jason Taylor
    New Jersey by way of Alabama

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  3. ebogan63 here.

    Thank you Smartypants for this post. As an African American, I and others understand the tightrope that PBO has to traverse, and why this constant nonsense about 'fighting' from some quarters irritates me to no end. Noone has explained to my satisfaction, how his accomplishments are not 'fighting for the very things they claim he does not care about? And why when he gets the constant disrespect from Republicans, all we here is crickets from the same crowd that claims he must 'fight' all of the time?

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  4. Thanks for this. It should be posted to as many other sites as possible.

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  5. This is so smart. I never realized this was what was at play here, but now it makes all manner of sense. Thank you! What we all know now is that there is no one who is better suited to the task of being the first black President than this amazing individual. The Boehners of the world can just keep making jackasses of themselves trying to elicit the reaction they're looking for, but only prove themselves to be the bullies that they are.

    I hope people will join me in reinforcing the message that we can't blame the President for not 'fighting back'; we need to blame the bullies for disrespecting him in the first place. It's counter-intuitive to not want to root for the person on the receiving end of the disrespect to stand up to the bullying, but in the end it will pay off, I'm certain of it.

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  6. Think about it for a minute. President Obama, like many previous politicians, has his faults and blunders. However, anyone interested in elected another evangelical Governor from Texas who has a propensity for the death penalty. We already know how that turns out.

    We all need to support this President. He is our only hope for a rational country. And the disrespect this man has received is astonishing and embarrassing.

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  7. Thanks everyone for your comments. I've been out for a while and away from the computer. But I really appreciate your contributions!

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  8. Thanks for this post. I appreciate your contributions.

    People also come around after the last President to realize that much of government runs just fine regardless of who's in the White House. Putting a specific person in the Oval Office or removing one President doesn't change that much about the country in the long run.

    Zach
    White Plains, MD

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  9. Zach,

    I couldn't disagree with you more. It matters a GREAT deal who's in the WH. As a matter of fact, it matters so much, there's no way I can summarize it well in one comment. But the government did NOT run well under Cheney/Bush. The differences in the performance of the AG and FEMA alone is a stark contrast. Going after actual terrorists rather that carelessly invading countries would be another example. I'll leave it at that for now.

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  10. Thank you for this. If I had a dollar for every time I've had to explain this to someone who insists that PBO "needs to fight" or "stop acting weak" I wouldn't have to work another day of my life. I'm glad there's at least one white person out there who gets it.

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  11. This is excellent - thanks for articulating this, and also addressing Zach's comment about it not mattering who is in the White House. It certainly does matter. One only has to look at Whitehouse.gov and see the hundreds of accomplishments there that effect everyday people who don't have millions to pay lobbyists, or see how veteran services are being improved every day. Your examples are glaring spotlights on real differences between a government that cares about the American people enough to withstand personal and painful attacks on their character, and a government that can say "so what?" in the face of opposition from the American people. It matters a whole lot.

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  12. Mo'nin', Ms. Pants

    I canNOT tell you (though I have) how many times I've tried to point this out to people who try to push the "weak" meme.

    Two words as to why there are more black and minority players in baseball and other sports: Jackie Robinson.

    What he had to go through to achieve the end....

    And, if anyone doubts the truth, and it IS the truth, of what Ms. Pants has presented, I will point out that there is something quite similar that the first woman in ANY significant power and decision making position will find herself in - particularly is she is gonna be President.

    Ms. Pants touched on it in an earlier post, but I'm gonna take it one step further.

    She'd BETTER NOT CRY.

    And, if anyone doubts this, I have three words for you, too: Congresswoman Patricia Schroeder.

    I'm confident in what I'm/we're all witnessing. I just didn't think I'd see it in my lifetime. And, for where we are as a country, Barack Obama is exACTly - on all counts - how "that man" has to be.

    As always, Ms. Pants

    THANK YOU

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  13. Mo'nin' Blackman!

    I think the Jackie Robinson analogy is perfect. And I'd defy ANYONE who'd want to call that man "weak." The strength it took to do what he did is almost superhuman.

    As you and I have discussed before - dick-swinging is the opposite of strength. Its a sure sign of the lack of it.

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  14. This is great, useful writing. Thanks for making this reader think. I'm appalled and embarrassed by the mostly white Congress' behavior and particularly by white male Republicans' behavior. Hard to keep your cool, but to do so is, indeed, far stronger than fighting.

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  15. Well done, SmarthyPants! White folks need to own their shit. PERIOD. It's not President Obama's to take on and he's not claiming it.

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  16. Some have said to share this far and wide and the bloggers on barackobama.com are doing just that. From a white perspective with some knowledge of what you're talking about, you made it CLEAR, so clear.

    Now, whenever the far left shows up to complain abut his restraint, we refer them to this article. It says it all.

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  17. Thanks so much! I'm thrilled at the idea that folks have found this useful.

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  18. BRAVO, SMARTYPANTS.

    I have read both of the original pieces that you reference, and I love your addition to it.

    I hope as many people pass this on as possible.

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  19. Glad I found you smartypants. What rikyrah said.

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  20. OMG Girlfriend - H E L L O!!!!!!!!!

    I'm so glad to be found.

    I sure hope you're still working on that new Sistah Speaks blog. I'm waiting...ummmm....patiently (?)

    It really is fun out here in the land of small pragmatic progressive blogs.

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  21. We're getting close. The address is
    www.sistahspeakbyrobinswing.com
    Soon we will have something more on the opening page. Having been leaning on the family crest and have some interesting folk writing for us.

    meanwhile...I love this blog. I only go to Dk to uprate bs hiderates and make a comment or two. When the site is ready I will post one more diary which I hope will make some heads explode.

    It is lovely to see a blog peopled by intelligent folk. Thanks again girlfriend.

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  22. Take a look at my blogroll over on the left.

    Down at the bottom, I have your url. The way that thing works is that the blog with the newest post shoots up to the top of the list. So the minute you post something - I'll see it.

    Can't wait to see what you've assembled.

    And I'll sure keep an eye out for that final post at DK. I KNOW I'll eat up every minute of that one. LOL

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  23. I don't usually read blogs, but I have enjoyed reading this one. Smartypants is brilliant, and I commend him highly for his article. I love it. He states so well (with insight and understanding) the feelings that I, as a Black American professional American, have felt throughout my 40 year career with insight and understanding.

    Yes, I will vote for Pres. Obama again, and I will volunteer and work to get him re-elected. He is a good, strong, intelligent man who loves our county and who wants to improve it and make it a better place for all of us, not just some of us as the other party would like to do.

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  24. Welcome artsy!!!

    Congratulations on hanging in there on this one for 40 years.

    And, of course, I'll join you in doing all I can to get President Obama re-elected.

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  25. yes we can ;do it again; president obama again for president. God protect Our County and our President. EWE

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