What it means to be the first African American President...getting your buttons pushed

We have probably all grappled with the experience that has been labelled "getting our buttons pushed." What we tend to mean by that is that there are people who know our sore spots...those places where we tend to react (in anger) because we have been hurt there before. When people know our sore spots and want to get us off our game, they can manipulate us into the reaction they're after. And so, for most of us, we have to eventually learn to deal with those issues to heal the hurt that caused them in the first place. Its either that or build gargantuan walls against the people who could touch those places, or live our lives at the mercy of those who would exploit us.

I believe that this is a frame through which some of us white folks might begin to understand what it means to be a black person in this country. For most African Americans, they have a lifetime of living with a sore spot...ways they have been hurt over and over again simply because of the color of their skin. It might be the obvious things, like being followed in a store or being pulled over by a cop for no reason. Or it might be having your accomplishments questioned because you are an "affirmative action" hire. Maybe it happened in school when you were directed to "vocational" choices instead of a college track - or when you and your friends were identified as a gang because you stuck together to defend yourselves from others who were trying to bully you. These things hurt - bad - and they piss you the hell off!

After awhile they build up and are added to the whole generational legacy of anger and hurt that Hamden Rice talked about. And so you have a sore spot that allows for the possibility of people pushing your buttons. And you have to figure out what you're going to do with it.

For many, this is where the "angry black man" stereotype comes from...and with very good reason. And then that is added to the list of sore spots. Angry black men are not allowed to express their anger.

This is the dilemma that President Obama is facing. And, as a reader at TPM says, African Americans are noticing how Republicans are trying to push his buttons when it comes to things like "schedule-gate."

When Boehner does something like this (that no previous Speaker has done to any previous President), when he refuses to return the President's phone call during the debt ceiling crisis, when he skips state dinners, when he refuses to definitely say that he believes the President was born in the US or is a Christian, or when Boehner coddles a member of his caucus who shout "you lie" during a Presidential address, etc one certain thing happens - black Americans notice it.

African-Americans are especially sensitive to the unprecedented disrespect that white Republicans have afforded to the first black President. Every time it happens, it ripples across black radio, black newspapers, black websites, and in conversations in black communities. It helps cement the ties that Obama has with the black community, and helps overcome whatever doubts and disappoints some may have. It reminds people who have experienced overt racism in their own lives that the President is experiencing the same kind of dehumanizing disrespect. It will help drive strong African-American turnout and overwhelming numbers for Obama next year.

Political pundits may gossip about the rift between Boehner and Obama, but millions of black Americans see something much more sinister when this happens.

Many white progressives think President Obama should get angry and fight back at these moments. But most African Americans have "been there - done that" and know that someone is just trying to push their buttons. Here's Vyan over at Daily Kos:

Black People hear these Dog-Whistles. They know what they mean.

And they also know that all of these little attacks are intended to Goad them. To make them lose their cool, to make them lose their temper, to make them look irrational and angry.

The Irrational, Paranoid, Screaming Angry Black Man.

That's what they want to turn Obama into. The Angry Black President.

They want him to start Complaining and Whining about the Republicans not treating him nicely. They want him to start "Playing the Race" Card, just so that they throw it right back at him.

And that's also why he resists. It may be infuriating. It may be crazy making. But this is the double-bind that many Black people have had to face all the time when these slights and broadsides come at them with racial undertones, but few clear or logical overtones...

I've lived with that internal, mental battle my entire life - and I very nearly have reached the "Fuck IT/FUCK YOU!" point more than once. Generally speaking, it didn't help much.

That's not the road Obama intends or needs to go down, sorry.

The truth is that white progressives are getting their buttons pushed every day by the Republicans. And they're pissed as hell that President Obama isn't expressing their anger about that. Would that they could learn a lesson or two from their black brothers and sisters about what a useless road that is to travel...as well as a glaringly stupid way to give away your power.