Is silence golden?

I wanted to take a moment to say I'm sorry that posting around here has been a bit sparse over the last few days. I'm not totally sure of the reason for that. But something is troubling me lately and I didn't want to say anything until I understood what it was.

This happens to me quite regularly...my instincts tell me something and it can be days before my head catches up to understand what its all about.

The closest I've come to understanding what's up is that it has something to do with the tension many of us are feeling as we await a ruling from the Supreme Court on health care reform.

My reluctance to speak started when I read some articles by people at Daily Kos who had trashed President Obama and the Democrats every step of the way through the process of getting ACA passed and are now in full doom-and-gloom mode about it being overturned. On the one hand, they continue with their rants about it being the worst legislation ever while playing on the fears of what will happen to people if it is gone.

To tell you the truth - their approach sickens me. I have always had a very personal aversion to panic. I won't go there. To wallow in the fear of something that MIGHT happen does no good unless you get your jollies off of playing on other people's fears.

But I think my silence has been about more than that. We all know that there is an awful lot riding on this decision by the Supreme Court. It will not only mean much to the millions of people depending on it now, it has the potential to affect millions more in the future.

Beyond that, no matter what the decision is - the entire political conversation will change once its been announced. The possible variations in what the overall decision will be are so numerous and complicated that it doesn't do much good to strategize until we know the specifics.

So we wait for the shoe to drop and know that once it does, most of the things we're focused on today will be forgotten.

Who knows how I'll feel tomorrow. But as of today, I suspect that my pull towards silence has been my way of dealing with both the weight and wait of the moment.